Honestly, though...I don’t know why we’re still talking about screen time, etc. The horse is out of the barn. We need to stop talking about the ideal and start talking about how to manage the real.
I think one thing a lot of studies fail to acknowledge is that iPhones and social media are here to stay. At this point, limiting “screen time” -- at least for teens --is just going to alienate them from their friends. And except for cases of cyber bullying, that stresses them out more.
I think we’re still asking the wrong questions. It’s not a matter of what’s the right age to let kids have phones, or how much time they should spend on them. That’s asked and answered--there’s no rolling back the clock. What we should be talking about is, what tools should we give them to help them to navigate what is, whether we like it or not, their normal. Teach them self-defense: What kind of posts could come back to haunt them? Teach them how to respond to what others post. When somebody posts a comment that makes no sense, I just respond, “OK.” Because there’s nothing to be gained from engaging someone who’s irrational. And for the love of all that’s holy, let them know that it’s ok to come to you with ANYTHING! (And for those of you who made it this far, here’s a little reward. I couldn’t talk to my mom about anything--very strict Catholic, and there were things you just didn’t discuss. And that was the origin of my commitment that my kids could ask me anything. I only failed one time. We were at church, and, during the Consecration-- the most sacred part of the Mass-- my oldest leaned over and whispered, “Mommy, what’s a boner?”)
Agree that teaching kids ways to respond and ways to notice their own feelings and experiences in social media is very important. Mentoring over monitoring.
Thank you for being a voice of reason!
Honestly, though...I don’t know why we’re still talking about screen time, etc. The horse is out of the barn. We need to stop talking about the ideal and start talking about how to manage the real.
I think one thing a lot of studies fail to acknowledge is that iPhones and social media are here to stay. At this point, limiting “screen time” -- at least for teens --is just going to alienate them from their friends. And except for cases of cyber bullying, that stresses them out more.
I think we’re still asking the wrong questions. It’s not a matter of what’s the right age to let kids have phones, or how much time they should spend on them. That’s asked and answered--there’s no rolling back the clock. What we should be talking about is, what tools should we give them to help them to navigate what is, whether we like it or not, their normal. Teach them self-defense: What kind of posts could come back to haunt them? Teach them how to respond to what others post. When somebody posts a comment that makes no sense, I just respond, “OK.” Because there’s nothing to be gained from engaging someone who’s irrational. And for the love of all that’s holy, let them know that it’s ok to come to you with ANYTHING! (And for those of you who made it this far, here’s a little reward. I couldn’t talk to my mom about anything--very strict Catholic, and there were things you just didn’t discuss. And that was the origin of my commitment that my kids could ask me anything. I only failed one time. We were at church, and, during the Consecration-- the most sacred part of the Mass-- my oldest leaned over and whispered, “Mommy, what’s a boner?”)
Aren’t you glad you stuck with me this far?
Agree that teaching kids ways to respond and ways to notice their own feelings and experiences in social media is very important. Mentoring over monitoring.
and aren't you glad she asked you? Rather than googling it :)
We’ll, that was a he, and an autistic he at that! But, yes, I was very glad he asked.