Do smartphones "make kids stressed?"

Spoiler alert: It depends. Also, there's a lot we don't know.

Everywhere I speak, someone inevitably asks me about "research that says smartphones make kids depressed/anxious/lonely." Or even that it “changes the brain.”

Teens getting more sensitive to social rewards you say? Doesn’t that sound like…adolescence? From the article:

“The study has important limitations, the authors acknowledge. Because adolescence is a period of expanding social relationships, the brain differences could reflect a natural pivot toward peers, which could be driving more frequent social media use.

“We can’t make causal claims that social media is changing the brain,” said Eva H. Telzer, an associate professor of psychology and neuroscience at the University of North Carolina, Chapel Hill, and one of the authors of the study.

I’ve talked to Eva Telzer as part of my research for Growing up in Public and have very high regard for Telzer and her colleagues. I’m not dismissing this research at all!

I just want us to see it in context— in the same measured way that the researchers do, which is not always how it comes through in media.

We need to question the easy-to-believe narrative. The answer is… we don’t know. We have very little proof, to date about the effects of smartphones on mental health. It's a good thing that there is more attention on these issues – and that there is research in progress.

When a few studies get circulated extensively in media, it becomes easy to imagine that there are dozens of studies coming out each week that suggest that smartphones make our kids anxious and depressed.

There is significant evidence generation is not “destroyed by smartphones” (see the 2017 Atlantic Magazine cover article that surely sold a TON of magazines.)

The good news: there is so much that parents can actually do (other than worry/panic/wringing hands).

I share many suggestions in this article, published by the Washington Post.

What can parents do if they are concerned about their kids’ mental health (if they suspect tech is to blame)?

If your child is depressed, look at all the possible factors — with the help of a qualified therapist. Consider technology in all its aspects including the ways YOU may be using it to surveil your kid.

Are you checking their grades online hourly? Are they?

If tech is a stressor, it may not be Tik Tok!

Next, you’ll have to determine whether it’s the root of the issues or a contributing factor.

• Who is your child interacting with on her device?

• What kind of content is he viewing? 

• What kind of conversations or interactions is he witnessing in that gaming server, on Discord, etc?

• Is she being harassed on an app?

Just counting the minutes of “screen time” won’t tell you everything you need to know.

Sleep is crucial

If your child isn’t showing signs of depression, but her use of technology is interfering with sleep, that’s a different matter. Sleep is integral to physical and mental health. Work with her to moderate usage or even occasionally unplug.

If your child struggles with poor self-esteem, body image, or frequent and intense conflicts with peers, social media and group messaging apps could exacerbate or reinforce negative patterns. Extreme examples would be looking at “how to” content about self-harm or disordered eating. Young minds have trouble recognizing this sometimes — which is where parents can help.

If you do suspect that your child is depressed, reach out to a mental health professional. If screen time seems to be taking your child away from physical activity or face-to-face interactions with family and friends, work with them to find balance.

Negative headlines tend to travel further than reassuring ones, but you can get curious about the kids you know.

Ultimately, we all have to look at our actual kids. Not some theoretical kids, or even real kids that filled out a survey. Our kids. If your children aren't sleeping or are focusing lots of their digital time on negative interactions, they do need some support.

Another great article: What teens think parents should know about phones came out in the Washington Post recently with some excellent quotes from teenagers. This could be a good one to read with your kids to ask them what they think.

Calling this generation "destroyed" is hyperbolic and unhelpful. Talk to the teens and tweens you know. They are pretty amazing, right? Let's listen to what they have to say before rushing to judgment.