Watching TV with our kids can be a GOOD thing.
Yes...screen time can lead to bonding, good conversations, and more.
Hi there,
Maybe you are feeling a bit of screen time angst, especially if you are on social media watching other families kayaking, hiking, camping out, etc. Remember, that's just the highlight reel. We kayaked too. In the San Juan Islands. It was gorgeous.
But my kid would have preferred to stay home and let it be known.
Teenagers, #amiright?
Honestly, sometimes a satisfying summer day ends with our family watching a show together. Here are a couple of gems that have some extra-great representation and conversation-starting potential in case you need something to watch.
We've been loving Ms. Marvel and I'm sad that it is over.
What's to love? Thoughtful South Asian and Muslim representation, multi-faceted representation of boys and girls as fully realized humans. Friendships that transcend simple gender roles and romance plots. Delightful representation of parental acceptance of differences...and plenty of action. I appreciate how the show takes on Islamophobia and how it celebrates kids in an urban public school in Jersey City. Who happen to be really, really smart.
Of course, it features the obligatory adorable but slightly cringe-y school counselor. If you are a real-life superhero with that job try to not take that part too personally.
The show is worth watching just for the opening and closing sequences celebrating street art in Jersey City. I might be biased (I was born in NJ) but it is hard to resist the mom from Karachi who moves to New Jersey because she loves...Bon Jovi.
Also, for you history buffs, Ms. Marvel addresses partition and a period of India-Pakistan history that our family had been learning about after reading The Night Diary, a gripping fiction book for middle grade and YA readers about one girl's experience of partition. In Ms. Marvel, I loved seeing the ways Kamala Khan's mother, father, and older brother initially don't understand her experiences but come through as supportive and accepting in the end.
Superheroes don't HAVE to be lonely and misunderstood. Lots to love about this series, just wish it had been a bit longer. And the music is going right to my Spotify queue. Some violence but not as intense as some other Marvel shows or movies.
I loved Heartstopper too. I watched this one alone: too romantic for the rest of my family. But many parents told me they have watched this one with their kids. This show is an irresistible love story between two boys set in a secondary school in the UK, adapted from the bestselling Heartstopper graphic novels. The adaptation uses quirky visual tropes from the books and is a very faithful adaptation.
Nick and Charlie and their friends are likable, believable characters played by actual young actors instead of model-looking 28-year-olds. The dialogue and ways the teens text each other in the show are so on point.
One of Charlie's friends is a trans girl, Elle, played by transgender actress Yasmin Finney. In the story, Elle's transfer from Charlie and Nick's boys' school to the girls' school next door is handled as a matter-of-fact part of the plot and expands their friend group to include more girls, including a couple that are also really fun characters.
The homophobic bullying is intense in the story, but love triumphs over all. Still, if you or your child has experienced bullying, or is a more sensitive viewer, I'd watch with care.
Heartstopper, is a perfect show to watch with teens OR younger kids. You could watch with a 10-year-old without the awkwardness of watching racier scenes as a family. Added bonus, the Heartstopper soundtrack is amazing.
I'm also a fan of Mindy Kaling's Never Have I Ever for similar reasons as Ms. Marvel and Heartstopper. Diverse, relatable characters grappling with real issues, including grief and loss. Several families shared with me that they watched this one together and loved it.
For sure, watching shows with our kids is an excellent way to start conversations.
▪ Have you ever heard someone called gay as an insult?
▪ Have you ever heard people make jokes about (Muslim people, LBGTQIA+ people? etc.)
▪ What could a friend say to be supportive in that situation?
TV and movies can be a helpful entryway into topics that can be hard to bring up or that the kids may be curious about but not asking about directly.
My friend Carrie Goldman wrote about watching Schitt's Creek with her three kids. It was a perfect conversation generator. Bonus: Her kids thought mom was very cool after Dan Levy tweeted about her article.
For us, another conversation-starting show was The Good Place. Watching The Good Place through those early pandemic months led to deep conversations about philosophy, friendship, and whether people really can change.
If there's a show that brought your family together or sparked a good conversation, please reply here to tell me about it, or comment here or on Instagram, if that's your jam.
Happy watching,
Devorah
PS: Here are some places I'll be speaking this school year. See you out there in the world !