Conflict Resolution for kids
End of school year screen stress and more
As you power through (or stumble through) the end of another school year, I hope there is one thing you are looking forward to this summer.
Eighth-grade graduation is coming up in my house and it is bittersweet. I'll be sad to say goodbye to the great teachers and community at this school. But, there are things about middle school none of us will miss, too!
Plus...high school! So exciting. We got to meet our son's high school advisor and he was AWESOME.
One thing Mr. Advisor said in the meeting — I was there but I put invisible duct tape on my mouth and tried to let my kid start this important new relations uninterrupted — was:
"You can come to me with ANYTHING. And I'll help you. But if you come to me while it is still a small problem, before it gets big, it will be easier."
Friends...I loved hearing that. So respectful. Such a great way to talk to a teenager.
Teaching Kids Conflict Resolution
I'm with middle schoolers a lot. When I'm doing big assemblies with kids, I always ask questions. When I ask a room full of middle school students:
"Why it is so easy to get into a fight over text messages?" – They have answers!
"You don't see the other person's face!" they tell me.
"Or hear their tone."
While some kids feel like emojis can bridge the gap, most acknowledge that it can be tough to communicate feelings via text, that humor is tricky, and that it is easy for things to go wrong. Group texts are their own special level of trouble.
Kids deal with small conflicts every day — it’s part of growing up. And being forced into a community where they have little control over who they spend their days with in school.
But social media and texting add a new frontier. While smartphones allow us to be connected in ways we couldn’t even imagine when we were kids, technology has added layers of complexity to the social sphere.
If you are a regular reader, you know me to be very tech-positive. I believe that the benefits outweigh the hazards – if and only if we develop the necessary skill sets to use the technology the right way.
It is easy to forget there is another human being on the end of digital communication – to feel less empathetic when there’s a screen in between us. Also, difficult emotions can be tempered, twisted, or misconstrued when filtered through the screen. Sometimes we say things online that we would not say in person.
Wondering if your kid's screen habits are bringing them down?
If you have a child who struggles with getting off screens or if you are feeling like tech time is causing a lot of family conflict or making your kid super irritable, I highly recommend the upcoming, FREE Screen Time & Mental Health Summit!
I'm excited to be part of this summit with super smart folks like Ned Johnson, Renee Jain, Nir Eyal, and Michael Rich.
Kudos to Fat Talk!
I'm so thrilled that Burnt Toast Substack and podcast host, author Virginia Sole Smith's book Fat Talk is officially a New York Times bestseller! The book is truly groundbreaking book and will help parents learn to identify diet culture, think through their own biases, and empower kids to navigate this challenging landscape.
Sole-Smith draws on her extensive reporting and interviews with kids and parents to reframe our thinking about food and bodies, and to help us work toward a more weight-inclusive world.
Location sharing article in The Wall Street Journal
Finally, I was thrilled to chat with The Wall Street Journal about location sharing and kids. I know they have a paywall so here's a screenshot of some of it:
I would love to hear more about location sharing
In fact, if your teen or tween location shares with friends on Snap Maps or another app, please connect us—I'd love to talk with them to hear about their experience! Just reply to this note and CC them or let me know the best way to connect.
Finally, thanks so much for your warm messages about my forthcoming book.
My fall and winter schedule is coming together. Let me know if you want to chat about an event in your community.